I make myself happy. I buy flowers for myself. I paint happy paintings. I take flowers to several different people. I love speaking with little children. I write happy stories for myself.
Drugs and alcohol does not work. Eating works, ice cream, but it is fattening.
Looking at what you can do for other people and make your self happy.

My Brother died unexpectedly.
He was an every morning runner of 3 miles, with his 45 min. yoga and breathing exercise. He was the healthiest one of my immediate family. One day he did his morning run and was taking too long of a shower so his wife checked on his and found him dead in the shower.
The initial shock still has not set in. Now I am the soul survivor. I'm sure glad that I wake up to beautiful flowers and feed all beautiful birds and my good coffee.
I have a conversation with my dead relatives and my brother Mark is the latest spiritual conversation. I remember the vacation in Spain, the picking of nettles, the vacation in Paris, Switzerland, and France. We were military brats.
I should have been the first to die with the alcohol, drugs, fast sports cars, and fast life that I made for myself. I should have been the first to have died but God has something else in mind for me. Life is a roller coaster

I am a happy camper. I've lived all over the world being a military dependent. I've graduated from the University of Texas with a B.A. in psychology . I've preformed on stage many times. I write a blog. I make myself buy flowers, I go outside and watch beautiful birds, squirrels and flowers and enjoy the sunrise. I paint pictures wwwimagineart.net and sell many and give away, I've had three of my paintings chosen to be printed on posters and the posters sent all over the state of Texas, I've had one of my paintings on a T shirt and maybe a second painting on a T shirt, maybe. I spread the good news to everybody that I talk to, from people that I talk to on the phone to people that I'm standing in line with at the store.
So why do I condemn myself. I am a winner. I am single and different.